December is a make or break time for EPL teams. A staggering amount of games are crammed into this four-week window. And while all 20 teams struggle to reach the New Year in one piece, we the viewers get to sit back and relax with egg nog in hand to watch all the goals go into the back of the net.
This past week we had our first set of mid-week EPL fixtures (inaccurately dubbed Matchweek 15). They were closely followed by a second slew of games three days later on Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. In the interest of time and space, I’m going to be a bit more judicious this week by picking only the creamiest of the creamy crop from those 20 games.
Raheem Sterling (Manchester City) receives an unbelievable ball from Kevin De Bruyne and slots it past Cech (72′) vs. Arsenal (2-1)
Nathan Ake (Bournemouth) drills a low header near post to open the scoring (6′) vs. Southampton (1-0)
Jay Rodriguez (Southampton) doubles up his goal total with a good ole’ fashioned turn-n-burn to seal the victory (85′) vs. Bournemouth (3-1)
Zlatan Ibrahimovic (Manchester United) knocks in a perfect header after 3 incredible long passes (5′) vs. West Brom (1-0)
Diego Costa (Chelsea) header far post in the fog (43′) vs. Crystal Palace (1-0)
Zlatan Ibrahimovic (Man U) uses a clever flick to split his defenders and send in a side-netter (56′) vs. West Brom (2-0)
Marc Pugh (Bournemouth) karate-kicks the Cherries into the lead (33′) vs. Leicester City (1-0)
Ashley Williams (Everton) breaks the late deadlock with a ricocheting header (86′) vs. Arsenal (2-1)
James McArthur (Crystal Palace) finishes off a beautiful series of passes (66′) vs. Manchester United (1-1)
Ryan Bertrand (Southampton) finishes off a stellar build up from the Saints (13′) vs. Bournemouth (1-1)
Sadio Mane (Liverpool) saves three points late in stoppage on the rebound (90’+4′) vs. Everton (1-0)
Around the World
Danny Latza (Mainz) caps his hat trick with a rocket vs. Hamburg (German Bundesliga)
Pieter Gerkens (Sint Truiden) makes it look like he meant to do that vs. Gent (Belgian Pro League)
What the Fuck Just Happened of the Week
I didn’t really know where else to put this, but I couldn’t not include it. Everton put on a Thermopoly-like stand to save 3 points versus Arsenal on Wednesday. Sorry DP.